week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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