oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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