Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(818): View more from California

I hate you but I'm not in hate with you

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(207): View more from Maine

I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?

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(315): View more from New York

2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?

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(513): View more from Ohio

the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.

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(917): View more from New York City

under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift

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(703): View more from Virginia

Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.

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(251): View more from Alabama

I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.

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