Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Green mimosas i think yes
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize