WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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