i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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