is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
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