Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Randomize
