I'm passing your future prison.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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