I'd wear matching sweaters with you
It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
