You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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