well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize