wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I party with great urgency now.
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