I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
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