Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
