so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
