After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Is it penis luge time yet?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
