"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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