based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
