Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
