if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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