you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
