That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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