I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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