This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
