I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
she woke up with a sticky ear
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
