do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize