I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
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