Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
