Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
