do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
IF I CAN STICK YOUR DICK IN MY MOUTH, I CAN STICK MY GUM ON YOUR NIGHTSTAND.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
