I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
