Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
