But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
My ass is underappreciated
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
