Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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