that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize