ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
