I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
