My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
this will be a night to untag.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
