All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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