oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I just googled if crying burns calories
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
