I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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