Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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