You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i came on her dog
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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