I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize