I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize