I just cut my nipple shaving
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
