Hey man sorry I got all grabby
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
