Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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