Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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