i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
