I hate your face
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
My mom is lecturing me about 'invaluable housekeeping skills' while I google 'cocktails involving gin' on my phone. I can feel the generational gap looming in her silent judgment of my choices.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Terrible idea I love it
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
